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IT'S REALLY ALMOST HERE!!

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THEY CALLED!

[well, Monday]
I even had an interview the same day and got hired on the spot!

That was the easiest interview I’ve ever had. Well, second — first was Starbucks at Safeway and that wasn’t even really an interview that was them telling me I got the job even though they had never met me. So, I guess I can say it now. ”Sure. It will be okay.” Now, I just have to wait a week or so for them to check out my employment history. I’m sure that 1-2 wks will creep along like all the others have, but at least the stress of waiting can go away.

[whew]



PS!! If anyone knows how to make the background of an image transparent, I'd love to know how. Keep in mind that I'm operating on a Macbook.

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Guess i'm just in need of a place to vent -- even though recently-- anyone that has ears has been subject to my random acts of babble.

Where to begin, really.

Ah. July 9th '09.
Went to work at Bux at 11ish; didn't have to be there untill 1230p. Worked all day and came home to a call from WalMart DC to schedule an interview just two days after I went in and filled out my app.
Perfect timing!
I had just put in my two wks and that would give me enough time to have a few wks off.
Awesome!
But not.
I called back the next morning and the woman told me that they had already finished that weeks schedule for interviews and that they will call me the following week.
Ok. Not so bad. Still rather excited.
Fast forward.
One week.
Two weeks-
nothing.

So, I decide to call them and see if I missed the call or what was going on. A different woman from before said that my application was on the top of the pile in the "schedule for interview" folder and that I should be getting a call soon.
FINALLY!
---but not really.

Fast forward to Aug. 10th '09.
Between the last call and this day, my sister, mother and husband have ALL been talking to people that have been telling them that I will be getting called within the next few days. By now, it's kind of getting old, but everyone keeps telling me that they're going to call and not to worry. Today, I had to go in and fill out another application because my previous app had expired.
...do what!? They called me on the eighth of July, I called back on the ninth, they never returned my call and NOW I have to fill out another app because you let it sit there and expire!?
Fine!

So I do it and I've been given instructions for my sister to be paged when I'm finished so she can come get it.
Easy as pie!
Wrong again.
They won't do it.
Whatever!!! I leave a message and leave.

Fastforward ONE LAST TIME to Aug 27th - 30th.
Wed the 27th I get a call from my mom saying that I WILL, without a doubt, be getting a call Fri or Sat. Most likely Sat and to stay home so I get it.
Great. House arrest.
By this time, my hopes are shot even though I still want to believe it...I honestly can't and say I do for my moms sake.
I can't sleep and when I do I'm having nightmares because I'm entirely too stressed out.
Friday comes and goes but I'm not TOO too worried about friday.

Saturday--
Nothing.


That was yesterday.
It's Sunday morning around 2am and I've used just about every tissue in the entire house on crying. Just thinking about it sends me deeper an deeper into the depression I've been fighting.
We're struggling to keep up wiith our payments..its bad.
We owe 2mnths of mortgage, 2mnths on TV/Phone/Web, 1 month of car, electric and utilities, 2mnths of car insurance and 2mnths of furniture payments.
It's to the point now that I'd deal with the stress that Sbux put me through just to make a bit of money to help out.
I do realize that its not WM's job to keep me employedn but it is their job to follow through with promises. Afterall, how does that make them look?

Ugggghhhh!!!

Tomorrow I plan on calling them and it will be my last attempt with them. I have to move on. We'll end up losing our home if I wait on them.

(sigh)

Off to bed.
We'll see how tomorrow goes.
Blackberry Email

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I've been absent.
Absent from all that is sane.

I'm leaving my job on the 20th of this month after 2 1/2 years.
My mind has been elsewhere. Definitely not anywhere near here.
Things are looking up/down/sideways -- it's all a blur.

I'm able to hold it together.
Put it into words. Pictures. Gestures.
I've been moving along with the pace of a snail yet everything is rushing by me.

Fast. Faster. Fastest.

I don't feel wanted/needed there anymore. I feel like I've outstayed my welcome - and though they need me [and boy do they need me] I have decided that it's now my time to part ways.
I've given my life to this place and I've gotten nothing back..except for the few best friends that I'll hold close - so very tight.

On the other side, I've never been happier.
My marriage is seeing highs it hasn't seen in a very long time.
Don't get me wrong. I've always loved my husband with love that could shake the heavens - I have always wanted the best for him - for me - for us. We've just been stretched to our limits with stress from me and my job for too long. It's time for a happier me.

That time is now.

As the countdown continues until I last step foot in that place as a partner, I look back and realize that I have had some of the best times in my life and met some of the best people. Even though there are a handful of bad eggs that I cannot stand the thought of, I never wish I hadn't met them. All of them had there place in my life. I don't regret much. The flip-side? I have met two people [who are still there] who I can clearly say will be life-long friends. A few others fit into the category of friends you see when you return and they'll always be a friend -- -- well, you know.

I'm nervous.

All I know is Starbucks. It's been my job for the last 4 1/2 years.

I'm hopeful about my interview.
It will be better for me. For us.

I'm in need of something new.








It will all be ok.

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I just wrote a whole journal entry and it disappeared.

C'mon dA.
















Sheesh.